your room smells of hookers.
And success
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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