Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.