so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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