Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
even my farts smell like vagina
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
it glows. i had to have it.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize