Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
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there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
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After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
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