after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
