Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
