Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Sober January is a disaster.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
