Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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