Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
