After last night, I could never be a politician.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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