oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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