There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
