Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
