She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
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