Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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