My friends, they love my intelligence
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
