you're like a bully in the Christmas story
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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