My first STD was from a foam party
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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