The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
