she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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