I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
