I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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