He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize
