i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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