Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
