frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!