my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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