doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
