Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I'm eating all of the evidence.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
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