some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
