I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Randomize
