Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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