I looked at my own cervix.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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