Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
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there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
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