I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i scared a bird with my dick
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize