Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
