To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize