North Korea, Best Korea!
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
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