doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
