I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
