So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
and she was petting her beer can
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I have fence marks all over my body
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
