I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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