Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
