Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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