Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
