Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize