yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize
