My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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