You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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