you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Randomize
