Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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